Abandonment- What If It's More Than We Think

Nov 02, 2023

Abandonment wounds are deep emotional scars that can profoundly affect a person's sense of self-worth, trust, and emotional well-being. They can manifest in various forms, from physical abandonment to emotional neglect. In this blog post, we will explore the key differences between physical abandonment and emotional abandonment, and the crucial importance of feeling seen, heard, and valued for our overall mental and emotional health.

Physical Abandonment

Physical abandonment refers to the experience of being left alone, without care or support, in a tangible and material sense. This can happen due to circumstances such as the loss of a caregiver, being placed in foster care, or the absence of a parent or loved one. The physical absence of someone who should provide care and protection can create a void in a person's life. This abandonment wound can lead to feelings of insecurity, a fear of rejection, and challenges in forming healthy attachments with others.

Emotional Abandonment

Emotional abandonment, on the other hand, is more subtle and can be equally damaging. It occurs when an individual's emotional needs are not met. This could be due to neglect, rejection, or a lack of empathy and understanding from caregivers or significant others. Emotional abandonment can result in a sense of unworthiness, low self-esteem, and difficulty in forming deep, meaningful connections with others. Unlike physical abandonment, emotional abandonment may not be readily apparent, making it challenging to identify and address.

The Importance of Feeling Seen, Heard, and Valued

Both physical and emotional abandonment can have profound and lasting effects on an individual. A fundamental human need is to feel seen, heard, and valued by the people in our lives. When this need is not met, it can lead to a wide range of emotional and psychological challenges. Here's why feeling seen, heard, and valued is so important:

  1. Self-Worth: When we are seen, heard, and valued, we develop a strong sense of self-worth. We learn to trust our feelings and perceptions, and we believe that we are deserving of love and respect.
  2. Healthy Relationships: Feeling valued is essential for forming healthy, fulfilling relationships. When we have a positive sense of self-worth, we are more likely to seek out and maintain relationships that are based on mutual respect and support.
  3. Emotional Regulation: Being seen and heard allows us to express our emotions and have them acknowledged. This, in turn, helps us regulate our emotions more effectively, reducing the likelihood of emotional outbursts or repression.
  4. Resilience: Feeling valued provides a foundation of emotional resilience. We are better equipped to cope with life's challenges and setbacks when we believe in our own worth and are confident that we have the support of those around us.

Healing Abandonment Wounds

Healing abandonment wounds, whether physical or emotional, is a challenging but necessary process. It often involves seeking therapy or counseling to address the underlying issues and learn healthier ways to cope with the impact of abandonment. Key steps to healing include:

  1. Self-Reflection: Understanding the origins of your abandonment wounds and recognising their impact is the first step in healing.
  2. Seek Support: Therapy or support groups can provide a safe space to explore your feelings and experiences, and to develop strategies for healing.
  3. Build Self-Compassion: Be kind and patient with yourself as you navigate the healing process. Learning to value yourself is a gradual journey.
  4. Set Boundaries: Establishing healthy boundaries in your relationships is crucial to protect yourself from further emotional harm.


Abandonment wounds, whether from physical or emotional abandonment, can have a lasting impact on our emotional well-being. Feeling seen, heard, and valued is essential for developing a healthy sense of self-worth and for building strong, resilient relationships. While healing from abandonment wounds can be challenging, with the right support and self-compassion, it is possible to move toward a place of greater emotional well-being and a more positive outlook on life. Remember, you are worthy of love, care, and support.

At Re-MIND Institute, we understand that healing from abandonment is essential for unlocking your true potential. If you're ready to start your journey to healing and growth, we invite you to reach out to us today. We're here to support you every step of the way.