The Joy of Missing Out: How Saying No Can Bring You Peace

“FOMO is rooted in fear and logic, but JOMO is grounded in intuition and faith. When you trust that what's meant for you won't pass you by, the need for comparision fades away.”

- Dr. Ashleigh Moreland

This is the concept of JOMO, the joy of missing out. It’s about stepping away from the fear and scarcity that drives FOMO and shifting to gratitude for the choices we make and the peace they bring. In this blog, we’ll explore how JOMO can transform your mindset, offer practical tools to embrace it, and highlight how this approach can help you feel more aligned in life.

Understanding the Grip of FOMO

At its core, FOMO is rooted in fear: fear of being left out, missing a better opportunity, or making the “wrong” choice. For many, this fear is so ingrained that it becomes a default reaction. Whether it’s the last slice of cake at a party or a tempting investment, FOMO makes us act from a place of scarcity rather than abundance.

In episode 91 of the Re-MIND Podcast, we spoke about how FOMO often overrides logic and values. Even when we know something isn’t aligned with our goals, such as indulging in food we don’t process well or making decisions that compromise our boundaries, FOMO can hijack our intentions. It creates a tug-of-war between our long-term values and immediate desires.

Why JOMO Matters

JOMO shifts the narrative. Instead of focusing on what you might miss, it encourages you to think about what you gain by saying no. Choosing JOMO doesn’t mean being rigid or never trying new things. It’s about making decisions that align with your values and recognising that joy can be found in letting go of what doesn’t serve you.

For example, saying no to an unhealthy meal isn’t just an act of restraint; it’s a gift to your body and future self. Missing out on a social event to spend a quiet evening at home isn’t loneliness; it’s self-care. JOMO invites us to embrace these choices with gratitude rather than guilt.

Practical Tools to Embrace JOMO

1. Reframe the Narrative
   When faced with FOMO, pause and ask yourself: “What do I gain by saying no?” Focusing on the benefits, rather than the perceived loss, can help you make choices that feel empowering. For example, instead of thinking, “I’m missing out on dessert,” shift to, “I’m choosing to feel energised and aligned with my health goals tomorrow.”

2. Identify Your Values
   JOMO is easier to embrace when you’re clear on what truly matters to you. Spend time reflecting on your values, whether it’s health, connection, growth, or peace, and let them guide your decisions. For example, if family time is a priority, declining a work event to spend an evening with loved ones becomes a choice rooted in alignment rather than guilt.

3. Create an “Anchor Phrase”
   Anchor phrases are simple reminders that ground you in your values during moments of FOMO. Examples include:

   • “What’s meant for me won’t pass me by.”

   • “This decision is an act of self-love.”

   • “I trust that I have enough, and I am enough.”

4. Practice Gratitude for the Gift of Missing Out
   After making a choice aligned with JOMO, take a moment to reflect on the benefits. Write down or mentally list the positives that come from your decision. For instance, after skipping an evening out to rest, you might notice how refreshed you feel the next morning. Gratitude solidifies the positive impact of your choice.

5. Use Mindful Breathing to Stay Present
   FOMO often pulls us out of the present moment. When this happens, take a few deep breaths and bring your attention back to your body. Grounding exercises, like noticing the sensation of your feet on the floor or the rhythm of your breath, can help quiet the fear-driven mind and reconnect you to your intuition.

Scenarios to Apply JOMO

Let’s look at a few relatable situations where JOMO can create a shift:

• At a Social Event: You’re at a gathering, and a tempting plate of dessert is being passed around. Everyone is indulging, and you feel the pull of FOMO. Instead of fixating on the treat, remind yourself of the gift of choosing what aligns with your goals. Later, reflect on how good it feels to honour your body and your commitment to yourself.

• Making a Career Decision: A job opportunity arises that looks good on paper but doesn’t align with your values or long-term goals. Instead of fearing you’ll miss out, focus on the clarity and peace you gain by waiting for the right fit.

• Choosing Rest Over Productivity: You see others posting about their achievements online, and guilt creeps in about taking a night off. Pause and reflect on how rest supports your growth and allows you to show up fully when you’re ready to engage again.

How JOMO Supports Healing

JOMO isn’t just about decision-making; it’s also a tool for healing. Many of us make choices from a place of unhealed fear, scarcity, or past wounds. Choosing JOMO allows you to break these patterns, trust yourself, and lean into faith that you’re on the right path.

In this episode, I shared an example of hiring someone for my business who seemed like a perfect fit, only to have the person back out unexpectedly. Though initially disappointing, I reframed the experience as a blessing, an opportunity to avoid greater challenges down the road. This mindset shift is at the heart of JOMO: trusting that even closed doors serve your highest good.

Start Small, Build Big

If JOMO feels unfamiliar, start with small choices. Practice saying no to things that don’t feel aligned and notice the impact. Over time, these small moments of choosing joy in missing out will build confidence in your ability to trust yourself and your intuition.

Invitation to the Heart-Centred Healing Hub

If you’re ready to explore concepts like JOMO further and learn how to create a life aligned with your values, join our Heart-Centred Healing Hub on Facebook. It’s a supportive community where we share personal growth insights, healing tools, and encouragement for living a fulfilling life. Connect with others on a similar journey and find inspiration to stay on your path.

Final Thoughts

JOMO is more than just a trendy acronym; it’s a powerful mindset shift that can transform the way you approach life. By embracing the joy of missing out, you reclaim your power, trust your intuition, and find peace in the choices you make. It’s not about giving up; it’s about gaining clarity, alignment, and a deeper sense of joy.

When we let go of the fear of missing out, we create space for something much more meaningful: a life that feels whole and true to who we are.

Watch Episode 91 of the Re-MIND Podcast here: